Dating Color Theory: What to Wear on First Dates and in Online Dating Photos

Color isn’t just fashion. It’s communication.

Before you say a word, before you smile, before someone even reads your dating profile, your clothes are already talking. And when it comes to dating—especially online dating, where people make decisions in seconds—color can quietly work for you or against you.

I’ve been teaching dating color theory since 2012, long before TikTok discovered it. What started as a personal experiment became one of the most consistent, repeatable tools I’ve ever shared with clients: what you wear changes how approachable, attractive, and safe you seem to others.

Let’s talk about what colors actually signal—and why green for women and lilac or salmon for men are my top recommendations.

Why Color Matters in Dating (and Online Dating Profiles)

Humans are wired to assign meaning to color from early childhood—red means stop, green means go, blue means calm. By adulthood, this color recognition is subconscious, instantaneous, and deeply emotional.

Dating is visual.
Online dating is hyper-visual.

Your photos don’t just show what you look like—they broadcast:

• How approachable you are

• How confident you feel

• Whether someone feels invited to start a conversation

Color plays a massive role in all of that.

Green Theory: Why Women Should Wear Green on First Dates

Trust me: wear green on your first date.

I didn’t learn this from a textbook. I learned it by living it.

Years ago, when I was single, I started tracking how strangers responded to me based on what I wore. I’m tall, confident, and often described as “intimidating,” so I wanted to know what actually encouraged people—especially men—to approach me.

The answer was overwhelmingly green.

Every time I wore green, I got more compliments. More conversations. More warmth. From men, women, and yes, even strangers walking their dogs.

Why Green Works So Well

Green is universally associated with:

• Growth

• Health

• Balance

• Calm

• Luck

• Safety

Across cultures, green literally means “go.”
It signals openness without aggression and confidence without intimidation.

It also doesn’t hurt that green is one of the most universally flattering colors. Whether it’s emerald, olive, sage, or forest, there is a green that makes every woman glow.

If you want to seem:

• Warm but confident

• Attractive but approachable

• Interesting without trying too hard

Green is your color.

Lilac and Salmon: The Best Dating Colors for Men

While green works beautifully for women, I recommend lilac or salmon (pink) for men—especially on first dates or in dating profile photos.

Here’s why: women are drawn to men who feel safe, friendly, and emotionally available. Soft purples and pinks signal exactly that.

Lilac gives off:

• Approachability

• Kindness

• Confidence without ego

Salmon (pink) does the same, with a slightly warmer, more playful energy.

Every time I compliment a man wearing one of these colors, I watch his confidence rise in real time. He stands taller. He smiles more. And confidence—real confidence—is wildly attractive.

Other Colors in Dating: What They Signal

Yellow

Yellow communicates optimism, creativity, and joy. If your personality is sunny and expressive, yellow can work beautifully—especially in photos. Just don’t overdo it.

Blue

Blue signals trust, stability, and calm. It’s a safe, solid choice—particularly for men—but it won’t stand out the way green or lilac will.

Red

Red is powerful. Sexy. Commanding.
It’s not ideal for a first date.

Red signals intensity and sexual energy—five chili pepper emojis worth. Save it for later dates, big presentations, or moments when you want to turn the volume up.

Colors I Don’t Recommend on First Dates

I know this part is controversial—but hear me out.

Black

Yes, it’s chic. Yes, it’s flattering.
But black is a missed emotional opportunity on a first date.

It doesn’t invite warmth or connection the way green, blue, or yellow do. Save black for date two.

White and Gray

White can feel untouchable or fragile. Gray is just… light black. You deserve better than that.

Dating Color Theory Is Really About Confidence

Here’s the secret most people miss: this isn’t just about how others see you.

When you wear a color that supports approachability and confidence:

• Your posture changes

• Your smile softens

• You flirt more naturally

• You feel like the best version of yourself

That energy is what people fall for.

Dating color theory isn’t about manipulation—it’s about alignment.

Final Takeaway: What to Wear on a First Date

• Women: Green

• Men: Lilac or salmon

• Everyone: Choose colors that make you feel confident, warm, and open

And if you want to understand why these small choices create big shifts in dating success, I break it all down in my book, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No Nonsense Guide to Finding Love.

Because dating isn’t about trying harder—it’s about showing up smarter.

Author

Maria Avgitidis

Maria Avgitidis is a bestselling author, podcaster, and fourth-generation matchmaker. As the founder and CEO of Agape Match, she blends a century-old family legacy with contemporary relationship psychology, matching high-achieving singles through a refined, community-driven process that has produced thousands of meaningful matches.